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Monday, March 1st, 2004
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10:08 pm
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i gotta say one thing to people that judge me
fuck you stupid fuckin haters
ill slit your throats in your sleep!
so dont cross me.
Much love to sarah lately man shes fuckin rockin the house up in this bitch. she knows how ta stand her ground and she knows i give it to her straight.
also props to my ninjas and ninjettes out there..yall keep on rockin
props to joanna and leah for bein my homiez
and fuck everyone else
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4:29 pm - 12 poems
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Ok good day people. going into genesis but its not for bad kids man.its for people with emotional issues and people that just dont likle big environments like me i hate big classrooms.
heres a poem.
<center>"Life in water"
Facades are steady dreams.
Steady streams.
watch the water run on down.
droplets cleanse my every breath.
putting my coldness to rest
shutting my eyes and standing there.
dozing into comfort but i'm still aware.
the steady warmth rushes down
i rub my shoulder with it.
around,around.
My dream falls from my head to my eyes.
warmth starving to give life to my eyes.
It runs down to my lips and the droplets die.
reborn ones soothe my face,run down to my thighs and waste away.
the running stream subsides and collides.
the warmth and stream has now died.
the stream on my skin is now dry.
my dream is over.
in the fluff is where i lye.
My dream fullfills itself the following day
without a word,
without a say.
i run to my dreamy stream
soon it is close by.</center>
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| Friday, February 27th, 2004
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10:56 pm
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i been thinkin about shit so heres some lyrics:
Begin, present, fade out,
Judgment please don't fail me now,
This time, this time
A lesson learned is a picture burned,
You're a memory to me,
Upon ignition come bear witness to the greatest therapy,
Just begin, present, fade out,
Judgment please don't fail me now,
This time
That was the day I put your picture aside.
Swallowed the fact that our dream had died.
Every time you close your mind,
You should be seeing me.
Every time you close your eyes (at night)
Every time you close your eyes
You should be seeing me.
As you lay in bed at night, I'll be there in your dreams.
So sorrows in, in that what you heard?
That you can cash in, on what we wrote,
Helpless isn't the right word but it's the first that comes to mind,
There's worse things than being unknown,
I think in time I'll get by
That was the day I put your picture aside.
Swallowed the fact that our dream had died.
Every time you close your mind,
You should be seeing me.
Begin, present, fade out,
Judgment please don't fail me now
You're to die for.
Life means more.
Out of sight.
With no light.
if you're reading this elisha,thats dedicated to you
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| Wednesday, February 25th, 2004
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6:41 pm - hmmph
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you never realize how good you have what you have until its gone and when its so close to deteriorating you want it so bad. you want it so much that it kills you inside.
i almost lost dominick last night because of us arguing and he just thought he was such a bad person and god i just love him so much.
our one month is on saturday.
:)
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| Monday, February 23rd, 2004
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8:23 pm
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OH NO! The fight's out
I'ma 'bout to punch yo...lights out
Get the FUCK back, guard ya grill
There's somethin' wrong, we can't stay still
I've been drinkin' and bustin' two
and I been thinkin' of bustin' you
Upside ya motherfuckin' forehead
And if your friends jump in, "Ahhh girrlll", they'll be mo' dead
Causin' confusion, Disturbin Tha Peace
It's not an illusion, we runnin' the streets
So bye-bye to all you groupies and golddiggers
Is there a bumper on your ass? NO NIGGA!
I'm doin' a hundred on the highway
So if you do the speed limit, get the FUCK outta my way
I'm D.U.I., hardly ever caught sober
and you about to get ran the FUCK over
Yeah so i got high off my FUCKIN ass today man i took a 512 mg perc...fuckin good shit and im still fuckin high i can barely type what im wrriting righgt herrrrr but im trying haha oh well boom bitch damn man ahahha thank u mam
yea soo i bought 2 percs today from this sick ass girl ashlee and they work dam good im buyin more tomorrow and ima get money together to buy a damn good supply o' weed so i can smoke outta tinny or somethin i really wana do a blunt haha woooooot
later
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| Sunday, February 22nd, 2004
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11:05 am - the butterfly effect and the chaos theory
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Some people think that it would be best for them to just change everything in one sitting. Well it isn't that easy. according to the chaos theory,even the flap of a butterfly's wings can create chaos a whole side of the world over. Did you ever think that the actions you took affected everyone else?
i didn't and i still won't
but it's just something to think about. it really boggled my mind watchihng the butterfly effect last night with dommi.sure i loved being with him but,it made me think.
I'm just glad i have him. i'm so happy hes in my life. i am not bragging,i'm just saying. he's told me his secrets,his most secret of secrets. not that i'll share but,i just feel so trusted and i trust him so much.
we talked about sex last night. i donno. our own month-er is coming up and i'm excited. for some reason,i can't see myself with anyone else. he's the most beautfiul person alive. and i love him more than i've loved anyone in my life.
It's nice.
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